Sweet Urine Test

The Importance Of The Power Of Observation In Medicine:

It is recounted that at King’s College in the Strand around the time of the war, the Chief of Services would inevitably begin the year’s rounds by teaching “a singularly important principle of medicine.”

He asked a nurse to fetch him a sample of Urine. He then talked at length about Diabetes mellitus. “Diabetes,” he said, “is a Greek name; but the Romans noticed that the bees like the urine of diabetics, so they added the word mellitus which means sweet as honey. Well, as you know, you may find sugar in the urine of a diabetic … ”

By now the nurse had returned with a sample of urine which the registrar promptly held up like a trophy. We stared at that straw colored fluid as if we had never seen such a thing before. The registrar then startled us. He dipped a finger boldly into the urine, then licked his finger with the tip of his tongue. As if tasting wine, he opened and closed his lips rapidly. Could he perhaps detect a faint taste of sugar?
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The Cardiologist’s Funeral

A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral.
A huge heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service.
Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.
At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him, he said,

“I’m sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral…I’m a gynecologist.”

Then the proctologist fainted.

Doctors Orders

A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor’s office.

After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said,

Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don’t do the following, your husband will surely die. Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant at all times. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him. Don’t burden him with chores. Don’t discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse. No nagging. And most importantly, make love with your husband several times a week. If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely.

On the way home, the husband asked his wife.

What did the doctor say?

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